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lyrics

My name is Hagrid and I have to say
This Hogwarts school is pretty lame
There are too many stairs, what’s the deal?
Why can't I get a teleporting meal?

You call it a school? But it’s not that cool
I’m to blame, but what can you do
Your school is based whos a good boy
Let’s see who’s dumbledores favourite toy

You're the boy who lived, what a shame
Your parents are dead and you’re to blame
You came to this school to have a good time
But you're just committing a terrible crime

Hello, Hermione, you think you're so smart
But yeah, hmm, where should I start?
Your hair looks like its covered in flees
But sadly it’s not as pretty as me

teacher's pet, never by yourself
Dumbledore thought you were a house-elf
Oh hey, it’s Ron… what
Oh yeah, the boy everyone forgot

Ooh, roasted by the hag...ird

Hagrid, he’s the best
Puts the students to their rest
Then he’s gonna eat their souls
Cause he sold his for rock and roll

There’s a snake in the bathroom, that’s my meal
A troll in the dungeon? no big deal
Children die and turn to stone
While I’m at my cabin smoking some bone

Maybe explain yourself Dumbledore
Nope, you're too busy pissing on the floor
You’re an old man, I can understand
But leaving a baby alone is kinda bad plan

Snape the incel, what a jerk.
You're a bully who shouldn't work
You're obsessed with a woman who's dead
and still, she won't give you head

Voldemort? Don’t make me laugh!
You’re just as pathetic as your emo staff
you make a big deal about tragedies
you won't eat children in front of their families?

HAHA LOSER

You’re listening to the hagrid bonus track
No, you cant have your money back!

credits

from Pagefire Presents​.​.​. Vulgar Display of Hagrid, released November 24, 2020

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Pagefire Oslo, Norway

A bunch of music nerds that make music. The official bandcamp to Pagefire.

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